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What to Say When He Comes Back After Ghosting

How To Respond To A Guy That Ghosted You (37 Ways)

by Sonya Schwartz

Sometimes, you find someone you can relate to, have fun with, and be yourself without any struggles. Depending on the situation, you could start a relationship or not. But, for some odd reason, they lose interest and end things abruptly. They suddenly cut all communication with you and leave in silence.

That is called ghosting. Ghosting never leaves a good impact on anybody. It leaves people hurt without getting any explanation for why they're going through the situation. Most times, girls who get ghosted fall into depression lose interest in being in a committed relationship.

Some guys ghost girls without any warning. But, at the same time, not every girl gives up immediately they're ghosted. Some hold on to their hope, while others accept the hurt, understand the situation as a goodbye, and move on over time. The truth is, it's not always easy to brush it off, especially if you were deeply in love.

If a guy who ghosted you comes back, whether you both started a relationship or not, you can sort it. There are ways or things you can say to respond to him, depending on how you feel at the moment. Here are 37 good ways you can respond to a guy who ghosted you.

Contents

  • 1 37 Ways To Respond To A Guy That Ghosted You
    • 1.1 1. "New number. Who's this?"
    • 1.2 2. "I'm now into someone else."
    • 1.3 3. "What happened to you?"
    • 1.4 4. "It's time for me to go AWOL, too."
    • 1.5 5. "You should concentrate on your new girl."
    • 1.6 6. "Nice to hear from you again."
    • 1.7 7. "Do you need any help?"
    • 1.8 8. Tell them how you feel about their actions.
    • 1.9 9. "I'm happy you're happy."
    • 1.10 10. Give one-word replies.
    • 1.11 11. "Have you sorted your life?"
    • 1.12 12. "I'm no toy."
    • 1.13 13. "I didn't expect that from you."
    • 1.14 14. Ask how they've been while they were away.
    • 1.15 15. "How do you expect me to react?"
    • 1.16 16. Be clear about their relationship with you when they get back.
    • 1.17 17. "You disrespected my feelings."
    • 1.18 18. "I don't like people treating me like trash."
    • 1.19 19. Talk to him as an ordinary person.
    • 1.20 20. "Why are you talking to me again?"
    • 1.21 21. "Do you do this always?"
    • 1.22 22. "I have nothing to say to you."
    • 1.23 23. Ask him how he'll react if they were in your shoes.
    • 1.24 24. "I need some time to think."
    • 1.25 25. "Give me some time to get used to you again."
    • 1.26 26. "I'm not sure I want us to communicate the way we used to."
    • 1.27 27. "I've lost interest."
    • 1.28 28. "You shouldn't do this to any other girl."
    • 1.29 29. "What you did wasn't cool."
    • 1.30 30. "I've moved on."
    • 1.31 31. "I can't trust you anymore."
    • 1.32 32. "It will take some time to normalize our conversation once more."
    • 1.33 33. "Will you be gone again?"
    • 1.34 34. "You should have told me you were not interested."
    • 1.35 35. "Let's hang out."
    • 1.36 36. "I miss the moments we shared."
    • 1.37 37. "Thank you for being there at that time."
  • 2 FAQs
  • 3 Conclusion

37 Ways To Respond To A Guy That Ghosted You

1. "New number. Who's this?"

Saying this to a guy who ghosted you, is one way to be sarcastic and serious simultaneously. Of course, they can't check your phone to know if you're being honest or not. If it's a guy who knew your personality, he could discover this. But, that's none of your business.

The aim is to stress him a bit to introduce himself. This is to hear what he has to say about his sudden disappearance. That way, you can decide to either continue talking to him or not. Do this most casually and let him do all the explanations.

2. "I'm now into someone else."

im now into someone else

When a guy ghosts you, he could feel you're so into him that you can't let go. The truth is, girls tend to move on with the nearest person who shows them love and care. It may take some time, but when the new guy meets their expectations, they say goodbye to their pasts.

Let him know he can't disappear on you and get back into your life without a message, whenever he feels like it. "I'm now into someone else" already tells him you've lost interest and you're no longer interested. You're planning to, or maybe dating another guy soon.

3. "What happened to you?"

If you were really into a guy before he decided to ghost you, you could say this to him. It doesn't matter if you were both in a relationship, or you were about to start dating. You need to hear his reasons. That's because sometimes, people don't disappear without any message for no reason.

Take your time to hear anything he has to say, whether it sounds logical or not. He could've lost his phone or gone to a place and had no way to send you any message. That's one way to respond to anybody who ghosted you.

4. "It's time for me to go AWOL, too."

It could be painful to be in a relationship with a guy, have fun with him, but wake up to meet his absence. Telling him you'll go awol doesn't necessarily mean you'll do it. You may decide if you want. Or, you could keep talking to him if you're cool with it.

But, saying this would indirectly make him feel almost how you felt when he left. It may not mean anything to him but maintain your dignity as a woman. It could be your way of saying you won't have as much time for him as you used to in the past. This is something you should try.

5. "You should concentrate on your new girl."

If you know his reason for ghosting you was because of another girl, tell him to concentrate on her. Some guys have a way of talking to many girls at the same time. But, they try to run away from those girls when they see they're all ready for a relationship.

Of course, you shouldn't be treated as a second option, and he should know that. Telling him this shows that even if you may be single, you'd prefer to remain that way than date him. Don't be scared, it won't make you sound jealous, it's just you telling him the truth. This is one way to reply to a guy who ghosted you.

6. "Nice to hear from you again."

You could say this after he has explained why he disappeared into thin air. It's a way to say you have no regret to have dated him back then, and you're glad to hear from him again. So, it keeps an open option for both of you to either continue where you stopped or part ways.

At the same time, it could be your way of telling him you're dating someone else, but you're not angry at him anymore. "Nice to hear from you" is a nice, neutral, and subtle way to friend-zone a guy without saying much. You should try it.

7. "Do you need any help?"

When a guy you used to date disappears and tries to come back into your life, ask him a straightforward question. Ask him a question that would require a yes or no response. If it needs more explanation, it should make him think a bit before talking.

It's your way of telling him you don't need him anymore in your life but will be willing to help him with no strings attached. At this point, no matter what he says, you've made up your mind to move on. Asking him if he needs your help is one way to respond to a guy who decided to ghost you.

8. Tell them how you feel about their actions.

Most times, people may not know how emotional their actions could make others feel. The truth is, he may have noticed you had feelings for him when he just wanted to be a good friend. It could be that, or he may have been afraid of how things would turn out.

Whatever the case is, let him know how you truly felt when he suddenly left. Did you feel sad, empty, used, or depressed? Tell him that. If possible, guide him on what to do when next he finds himself in a similar situation. That's a way to reply to someone who ghosted you.

9. "I'm happy you're happy."

"I'm happy you're happy" is something to say to him when he returns and sounds happy even when he knows he's at fault. He could pretend not to know he hurt you. In that case, you should also act like everything is fine. It would be more beautiful to say it if he's in another relationship.

Tell him you're happy to know that he's alive and doing well without you in it. If you say that without making it a big deal, it would be easier for you to ask him questions about

When you're sure a guy ghosted you with any good excuse, you don't show him any excitement that he's back. Even if you are, it's good to let him know that what he did wasn't cool. So, respond to his messages with short and straightforward answers.

Let him wonder what you've been up to. Depending on how you pull it off, he could feel a bit of how you felt when he decided to end things without a message, call, logical explanation, or closure. This would indirectly tell him you're not interested in anything he has to say, because you already know it all.

11. "Have you sorted your life?"

This is one reaction you can exhibit when he comes back with many reasons to support his action. It doesn't matter if they sound logical or not, ask him if he's okay. The only thing is, it will make you sound a bit rude.

It shouldn't sound nice. It's a way of making him rethink his reasons to see if they make sense or not. It's more like a neutral way of telling him you're not as interested as you were in the past. You're also telling him to go back to his life until he feels it's completely sorted out. That's one way to respond to anyone that ghosts you.

12. "I'm no toy."

i'm no toy

Only toys are treated a certain way because they have no human feelings to respond to. That's what he should know. You're a woman who has feelings and can easily get hurt when maltreated. He should know that it's not okay to be radio silent and come back whenever he pleases.

This sentence needs no further explanation. Nobody needs any dating advice to understand the meaning of this statement. It shows that even if you may consider dating him in the future, he has to respect you, and not do as he pleases. This one way to firmly tell a guy that he messed up.

13. "I didn't expect that from you."

It takes time to get used to a guy, trust him, and build your world around him. It doesn't matter if he's a platonic friend or you both want to date. Of course, people can be unpredictable, but there are certain people you can be sure won't disappoint you.

He may not have understood it that way, which is why he may have decided to ghost you. But, you have to tell him when he returns. Make him understand how you felt when he, your boyfriend left you hanging. It's one way to communicate with a guy who ghosted you without a call or message.

14. Ask how they've been while they were away.

It may not be that easy to ignore someone you were involved with but didn't have closure. You may have moved on during the period he was away, but it will be different when he comes back. Those feelings will find their way back to your heart.

It's okay to still have feelings for a guy who decided to ghost you. So, you could ask him general questions about his life. Even if you're no longer interested in dating him, it's not a big deal to be friendly with someone you once loved. If you wish, you could also tell him a little about your life.

15. "How do you expect me to react?"

Some guys expect a girl they ghosted for a long time to jump and accept them immediately they come back to message. This means a few of them could exhibit a little attitude if you seem unhappy to hear from them.

If he does this, replay the scenario from your perspective, and ask him how he'd react to see you if he were in your shoes. That way, he'll understand how it feels to date someone you love, and be ghosted without a heads up. Be careful while saying this, so it doesn't start a fight. That's the last thing you want to get involved in.

16. Be clear about their relationship with you when they get back.

It's very important to ask a guy or confirm your relationship with him after he gets back from his ghosting mode. You don't want to hope for something that may not work out, just the way it didn't in the past. You don't have to be angry about it.

Call, message, or organize a hangout with him, to discuss the way forward. It may sound unnecessary at the moment, but it will help reduce any hurt in the future. You both don't need to date afterward, you could become good friends or potential business partners. If he's someone you'd like to keep around, this is one good way to go about it.

17. "You disrespected my feelings."

If you had gone far with him, like in a committed relationship, it's best to tell him how he made you feel when he decided to disappear. This statement shows him how honest you were when you both shared good moments. You don't need to say much after making this statement.

It would make him understand the implication of what he did. That way, he knows you had much respect for him when you were dating. As direct as it may seem, this is one way you respond to a guy who ghosted you.

18. "I don't like people treating me like trash."

Imagine having so much respect for a guy, and he suddenly disappears into thin air without a message. It's heartbreaking. "I don't like people treating me like trash" will show him how well you looked forward to a better relationship with him in the future before he left.

Make it as casual as possible. Casual messages have a strong hold on people's memories. It makes him wonder what they can do to make it up to you. So, he'll know that, no matter what he says, you're no longer interested in being in a relationship with him.

19. Talk to him as an ordinary person.

One good way to treat any guy who ghosts you and returns is to speak to him as if he never left. Make it look like you're not bothered to even when it's obvious that you are. Ask him light questions about his general life and how well he's been doing. Do that and let the past slide.

Of course, you may be tempted to ask why he left without any message, but the aim is to leave him helpless. When you do this a few times, he'll naturally start explaining things for no reason. He'll try to make you understand why he left, especially if he needs you back for a relationship.

20. "Why are you talking to me again?"

why are you talking to me again

You appreciate that he has reached out. But, the last time you checked, your relationship had ended a long time ago without any message. So, you want to know why he has finally decided to send a message out of the blues.

It's a direct question that will make him spill out reasons for deciding to ghost you. It may be awkward for him at first, but if he feels you both should date, he would eventually say his reason for reaching out. If he does, you have many options on how to respond to him, depending on how you feel.

21. "Do you do this always?"

The chances are you may have been talking to a player who ghosts people for a living. When a guy who ghosted you tries to get back into your life, ask if he usually does it to other girls. It could leave him speechless, or make him realize that what he is not acceptable.

You want him to be honest about why he left without saying goodbye. It could make you sound a little bit emotional, but it's necessary to engage him in a conversation like this to achieve a good closure. In this case, whether there's a good explanation or not, some puzzles in your head would settle.

22. "I have nothing to say to you."

One excuse guys give is that they were going through a phase they didn't want to affect the girl. Or, they were facing a challenge and they needed some time alone. In a situation like this, whether you have something to say or not, you automatically become speechless.

You have a million words to speak, but you can't say them, especially if you both had gone far in your relationship before he decided to ghost you. Don't be tempted to use abusive words. Try your best to keep it calm and cool to avoid causing more hurt to yourself.

23. Ask him how he'll react if they were in your shoes.

You may be tempted to ignore a ghost completely, but you should sort things in the little way you can. The aim of sorting it is to avoid any future complications that you may be unable to control. So, read his message thoroughly and pop the question.

It's not like you can't approach it your way, you just want to be fair enough to listen to his perspective. Take your time to discuss the entire situation with him. If he makes sense, you don't need to speak anymore because you know he already understands how you feel. If he doesn't, let it go and move on for your sanity.

24. "I need some time to think."

When things like this happen, you may need some time off to think clearly. You don't want to react in a way you shouldn't. So, if you can, ask him to give you some space and time to think about having him in your life again. This means he shouldn't call or text until you reach out to him.

Whether you both plan to date or remain friends. It's hard to get used to a guy that ghosted you almost immediately when he comes back. As a human, you need time to process certain things and decide on the way you want to handle them. So, take your time to do so.

25. "Give me some time to get used to you again."

Sometimes, you may still have feelings for a guy, even when he ghosts you. If he stays away for a while, you may begin to forget about him and concentrate on someone else. Of course, you'll catch feelings for him if he reappears.

If that's the situation, and you know you would be unable to concentrate on your new relationship, you could ask him to give you some time. That way, you can think straight, and decide whether you want to continue loving him or not. It would be a peaceful decision for you to make.

26. "I'm not sure I want us to communicate the way we used to."

As a woman, you'll always have guys that like you enough to date you. If a guy ghosts you, comes back, you're thinking of dating someone else, and you know it will affect you, tell him to stay off. That way it affects him just like it affected you when he left. It's not revenge, but clarity.

You could also say this if you're already in a relationship. It's a good way to create boundaries, so it doesn't affect you in any way. Tell him you could be acquaintances or friends and nothing more. It's a way to settle any business you had with a ghost.

27. "I've lost interest."

For some women, out of sight is out of mind. If you fall under this category, be straightforward with him. Let him know you've moved on many times, and you're not interested in him anymore. But, it's a big turn-on for guys when girls show they're not interested in them.

As he left without a word, say it to him in a casual way. It will only help end things between both of you in the most unexpected way possible. Don't say this if you still feel something for him. Make sure it's from your heart and you mean it just like you're saying it.

28. "You shouldn't do this to any other girl."

Many guys ghost girls, not caring how they feel or the repercussions in the long term. They don't know many girls get emotionally sad, and sometimes depressed. This makes them develop tough skin when it comes to loving the next guy. Some could get violent, depending on how bad it gets.

Saying this to him would only make things better, even if he doesn't take it immediately, he would remember in the future. It also means you felt so bad, you wouldn't want any other girl to go through the same pain he made you experience.

29. "What you did wasn't cool."

what you did wasn't cool

If you're a lady who forgives people easily, you could say this when he returns. It means you're not happy with his behavior, but you're willing to listen to his excuses. You may not necessarily believe them, but you'll give him a chance to explain himself.

So, you could say this before or after you ask him to tell you what's been happening to him. Of course, you may not be as close as you were before he ghosted you, but you may reconcile amicably. This is a peaceful way to speak or chat with a guy that left without a word.

30. "I've moved on."

It doesn't matter if a guy ghosts you for the shortest or longest period, you may have moved on with your life. Moving on may mean dating someone else, improving your career, or accepting that he's not in your life anymore. It means that something has changed since he left.

You're now a better person, and you've accepted your new life without him. It may seem like saying this is blunt and straightforward, but you need to let him know what it is. Even if you haven't moved on, it will help to keep things in check. It will also let them know you're capable of dating someone else.

31. "I can't trust you anymore."

It's not easy to trust anybody when you meet them, not to think of trusting them when they disappear and come back to you. Let him know it's not easy to build your trust and love with someone, just for him to kiss you goodbye silently. You're also human and he should know.

This sends a clear message that no matter what he does, you are not interested in him anymore. It means you're not even ready to keep him as your friend or an acquaintance. It may sound rude, but it's one way you can handle a guy who ghosts you and comes back.

32. "It will take some time to normalize our conversation once more."

Many times, when bad things happen between two people and they reconcile, it's not always easy for them to return to how they used to be. The same thing applies to you and any guy who ghosts you. You both may be unable to get back to your normal conversations.

If you feel this way, you can tell him. If he's patient, he could wait for you to come around. If not, it could be a final goodbye to your relationship. Like he took his time to come back after he left, you also deserve to take your time to make any decision you want.

33. "Will you be gone again?"

Sometimes when a guy ghosts you, he could feel bad about it, hence, come back for closure. If you still have feelings for him, you could ask him if he's back into your life to stay or leave. That way, you know if to have high hopes or let go.

This question shows you have your back. Although it may show your vulnerability, it's your confirmation to help keep things on track. That's to know if you should warm up to liking him again or shift your interest to someone else. To avoid more hurt, you should ask him this question.

34. "You should have told me you were not interested."

Sometimes, you wish people could be truthful to you, instead of doing things without a message. If you feel this way, you can say this to him. Tell him you would prefer if he had told you he wasn't ready for a relationship.

This statement mainly applies if you want to vent. It will serve as a good introduction for you to express yourself however you want to. In this case, you should be ready with your points, and anything you can say to defend anger.

35. "Let's hang out."

You can ask him out for coffee to talk. That's if you're uncomfortable discussing or chat on the phone. If you also feel there are numerous things to say, and you'll love to clarify them. Find out when he'll be free to discuss outside.

Make sure you also have enough time to say anything you have to say to him. Physical meetups have a way of clarifying things more than you can ever imagine. But, do this only if you're fine meeting or seeing him.

36. "I miss the moments we shared."

i miss the moments we shared

If you're a peaceful person, you could use this statement when he reaches out. Saying this doesn't mean you're considering dating him. It only means you valued him and the moments you both shared.

You could reminisce about the different moments and the specific thing you loved in each of them. That way, you get to feel good about the past and having him around without any bad thoughts. You also get to make peace with yourself.

37. "Thank you for being there at that time."

It doesn't have to be all bad. A guy may have ghosted you, but may you have needed it at that moment. Sometimes, these things have to happen for people to grow, or learn good lessons. Maybe, if he didn't ghost you, you wouldn't get a good job offer.

Or, found the best partner. So, write down the positive things that happened to you after he left unannounced, and thank him for leaving you. It will help take some burden off your mind. You may not know this, but it would also make him feel guilty for leaving.

FAQs

What to message someone who ghosted you?

"Hi, How have you been?" or, "Hey stranger." Send any message that falls in the category of any of those two awkward messages. It shows him that you know he ghosted you, but you're nice enough to message him. You could also message "I guess your phone crashed."

Should I text a guy who ghosted me?

You don't have to text someone who ghosted you. But, you can text him if you have if you feel the need to. That's because sometimes, he could be sick, or going through a challenge he needs help for. But, if you're sure it's none of those, you don't need to text him. Focus on other things.

How do you respond after being ghosted?

If you're texted after being ghosted, make your response as short as possible. Don't start ranting when he sends the first message. Be polite and calm as much as you can, so he gets encouraged to text again. You could start venting when you're sure he won't ghost you anymore.

What to say to a guy when he ignores you?

You can send a neutral message like "what's up?" It will give him the platform to explain why he ignored you. It will also show him that you're taking the whole situation easy, and would not fall for any emotional manipulation. When he notices this, he may stop ignoring you.

Should I text a guy who hasn't texted me?

You don't have to text any guy who hasn't texted back. It's not necessary. You could text him once to find out if he's okay. A simple and straightforward message would do. Avoid sending long paragraphs or insults to express how you feel. It doesn't pay to do that.

Conclusion

There are numerous ways to respond to a guy that ghosted you, but you can start with the 37 ways I've mentioned to see how things turn out. Take your time and don't be afraid of expressing yourself the way you want to. I hope you liked this article. Please drop a comment and share it with others.

Sonya Schwartz

A hopeless romantic that struggled for many years to find her Mr "Right" and made all the mistakes you could think of while dating. Known for always choosing the wrong guys or messing up relationships, Sonya was finally able to change her approach and mindset when it came to dating which helped her eventually find the man of her dreams and become happily married. You can read more about me here...

What to Say When He Comes Back After Ghosting

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